MissDissent (missdissent) wrote,

The Big O

I arrived at the scheduled 8am, and found that everyone else had been queuing for hours! I started the queue at Circular Quay, heading up Albert Street, and then down Macquarie Street...

The City of Sydney had spent some bucks with flags bearing Oprah's face running down the street. Women outnumbered the men in the queue at least 8 to 1, though there were some homosexual men with nice sunglasses. Despite knowing they'd be sitting on the ground, most of the women dressed up as if they were actually going on television.

Almost at the Sydney Opera House Forecourt... to the left of this image I went through a barrage of 8 metal detectors with 6000 people. I saw pat downs, and all guests were made to open their bags. Then you were given a survival bag with water, sunscreen, a blow up cushion and a rain jacket because Oprah cares about your comfort.

Despite my on-time-equalling-late arrival, I got a pretty good view of the stage by jumping into a gap that the early-queuers had left. Naughty me. The preamble for the show included enforced cheering, jumping up and down, and an awful entertainer called Paris from Melbourne.

At the front of the stage you can see the 302 Americans, all in a bunch. Some of them got up on stage for a dance in the preamble. There were some hotties, the hottest of all wore a vibrant yellow dress with a tan belt. Her smile was three acres wide, with lots of white, pearly teeth. She was like a mini-twenty-years-younger-Oprah. Look for a tiny blur of yellow. She waved an Australian flag for most of the show.

Oprah arrived in a hire car, and then walked in a bright orange dress right past where I was sitting. She's quite a commanding woman.

Oprah gave a million bucks (from Microsoft HP) in computers to Canterbury Boys School and $250,000 courtesy of Xbox to a cancer sufferer. Jon Bon Jovi can't sing anymore; Russell Crowe's aging badly and Bindi Irwin's gone from awkward to hottie (if she keeps her mouth shut).

This is Jon Bon Jovi singing badly. Russell Crowe's most comfortable moment was distracting the crowd by revealing some of the Rabbitos in the front row. Danielle was there with her mother in the front row too, as well as some girl called Jenna who got her front row seat by taking photos with 363 Australians holding a sign saying they wanted Jenna to meet Oprah.

The 6000 strong audience all received a voucher for a $695 pearl necklace from Kailis. The show will air in January. Oprah condones gathering your friends and drinking tequila on her. The show's 25 year history will come to an end in May 2011.
Tags: events

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